Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Kristen and the Bird

My parents have HUGE windows in their house. They let in beautiful sunlight, give us 180* views of the backyard (so we can make sure Jamison isn't escaping), and kill an inordinate number of dumb birds who try to fly through the windows.

Normally my mother notices these victims relatively quickly and quietly disposes of them. In the spring Jamison discovered one and my mother turned it into a "doesn't God make beautiful animals?" lesson. And then she got rid of it during naptime. Naturally, it was the main topic of conversation with the kids for the next week. They are enraptured by death.

A few weeks after that I sent Jamison into our backyard to play in the kiddie pool and burn off some energy. He came back into the house about 15 minutes later to inform me he was swimming with chipmunks. I was incredibly confused since I wasn't aware of any toy chipmunks that we had laying around. And then my heart stopped and I almost threw up. THERE WERE DEAD CHIPMUNKS FLOATING IN THE KIDDIE POOL.

I tossed Jamison into an almost boiling bathtub and scrubbed him down for 30 minutes. He was miserable and crying, I was freaked out, and Lily wanted to go see the chipmunks. Needless to say that was the end of the kiddie pool and the summer hadn't even started. I couldn't deal with the thought of my children swimming with DEAD RODENTS.

So when Kristen secretly waved me over to my parents back porch to see the dead bird I was not pleased and went slightly ballistic. I think I had a right to do that. She had to be the one to get rid of the thing since I was still pregnant and used that as an excuse not to get near dead animals. A very valid point, in my opinion.

Just do it Kristen, and get it over with!

I am slightly confused why she didn't put any shoes on to perform this task. What if the gross, dead bird had fallen on her feet? YUCK! (although it could be that she had a hysteric 8-month pregnant woman whisper-screaming to her to remove the bird from the play area immediately)

And that was the end of Tweety. Rest in peace somewhere in the weeds. I just wish he had stayed alive long enough to twitter to his friends to stay away from the windows at the Meeks house.

1 comment:

Allison said...

Man I miss you two! Can I come visit next time Kristen is in town? I need some good laughs! (Plus a trip to NY would be nice...)